When they’re just not into you
The experience, the pain and the anger.
By Maryam Sanita
Of course a very vast topic however, this will be one of many. We all want it, we all talk about it but do we all get it?
Plenty of clients come to me for all sorts of reasons covering every corner of this topic.
You have the concerned mother wanting to check up on the safety of her children.
The ex husband who finally realised he’s been a complete douche through out the marriage but wants to fix things now the wife has had it – Yeah, believe it or not it happens!
The wife who’s struggling with her not so good husband
The person who wants to just check up on his/her career and finances making sure they’re on the right path
The person looking for a promotion or a new job checking to see if now is the right time
Well the list goes on!
However, the most popular one?
What is he/she thinking about me? Does he/she love me? Do they want to settle down? Will he/she call me? Will he ever divorce her/him for me? … But I’ve saved the best for last, the one and only ” IS HE/SHE CHEATING ON ME” You know EXACTLY what I’m talking about!! I can even picture most of you giggling in shame think “Yup! That’s definitely me!”
We’ve ALL been there at some point in our lives or in some cases in most points of our lives 😛 (You do it to yourself)
The tears we’ve all shed believing that life will come to an end without them – it’s so funny because I’ve seen this happen so many times and they both end up in one of the 2 situations.
They end up finding their true love and go off to live their happily ever after. Just kidding, I’d be out of business if there was such a thing lol! There may not be no happily ever after – but they sure are better than the previous asshole.
They end up being with this person in the end passing all their tough times and moments – Mind you this is VERY rare. I would probably say for every 10 clients 2 for this category… And out of the 2, 1 end up separating in the long run. Showing you that when something just isn’t meant to be its just not meant to be!
I find this mistake mostly with women, not men. Yes ladies… Men do get attached too, they’re just better at dealing with it. No wait, they actually listen to the advice and guidance and stick to it. But mind you, not all of them. The guy who’s been a douche most his life and now the woman is getting up to leave – well he’s desperate and in panic. So no, he’ll try do what he can. In some extreme cases some seek major “black magic” sorcerers. Lol, bless you child. It doesn’t work that way – you can’t force you need to heal the both of you and actually try to change – just saying!
Why does this happen? Well, I’ve seen in so many cases a woman cry and within her own actions she makes her own life hell – why?!
Well, I can’t talk – I’ve done this before :’)
But I must admit, I feel very silly for doing this over something that’s going to be a part of my past. Instead of wasting time crying or making my life hell – I could of done a whole lot more with that wasted time. Oh well, we live and we learn.
The majority of us ladies become accustomed to the other guy – training our minds to believe this is what we want but when it’s actually what we’re used to. Your not attached to him or his ways – remember how it pissed you off every time he does a certain thing. But only because he’s gone you are willing to change. But why? Your actions is actually your brain SCREAMING to you. Your not going mental, why are you forcing yourself within all this suffering? As a women, naturally we find it hard to let go. But what is it that were so terrified of letting go of?
His lazy ways? The way he never cleans after his mess? The way he expects you to literally mother him while he acts like an absolute imbecile. Please feel free to share experiences of things you’ve expected in the comment box below.
It’s because we feel that’s our only chance of stability. Our only way of being normal – this is what we were meant to do, look after him, groom him, entertain him, feed him and yet still he’s not thankful. Still, he finds something to complain, what else?
For men I’ve seen cases far worse! A man holding all of her expenses, rent, utilities, phone, car and holidays for her to go off with another bloke! Oh yeah, and she’d expect him to do all her chores and even pick up her kid (another mans child) without her ever having the slightest thought of ever getting serious with him – well that’s just purely mean. Well, there’s a word for women like that but I’m not looking to express that word in this space.
As humans with feelings and emotion, we accept these things in hope the other person might turn around and realise all you’ve done for them. But I’m sorry guys, that’s mostly not the case!
Some of you even turn to say to me ” But Maryam, I don’t care… I just want them to be happy!”
If that’s the case, by all means please go ahead. But you weren’t and still aren’t happy.
You’re doing these things without being identified for all the good you bring onto the table. Sometimes, we need to ask ourselves… What are they doing for us? What has he/she done lately to make you feel happy? Has he ever done anything? But not in all cases, we sometimes need to find out what the other person is going through. Regardless, this is no excuse to have you being walked over like a filthy doormat.
Love yourself, trust me… I’m a psychic.
It’s astonishing to see how many of us are actually very insecure and fear being alone. Don’t worry, we’ve all been there. It’s okay!
The other day I read a great quote
” If you can’t live by yourself, you don’t know who you are” YESSSSSS!
This doesn’t only go about living alone, it also goes with being alone. There really is nothing wrong with it. If anything it’s a great chance to do the things you’ve always wanted to do. – didn’t have any? Then you have a lot more work to do – Learn who you are! Discover yourself! Be comfortable with yourself! This is healthy and you can consider it to be training for the next great person that walks into your life.
Why do we always hesitate when it comes to dating? I’ve advised so many to go out dating rather than staying at home sobbing about Mr. No good ( or miss in many cases).
The response I get all the time ” But I don’t want anybody else just him” sorry I’m saying him, because I only really hear this with my female clients. But again this can go towards my LGBT clients too – gosh y’all are sensitive and take the smallest to heart. But at least my Gay clients actually listen and turn their bitch face on – sorry I mean they turn up their game.
BUT WHO SAID TO FIND SOMEONE ELSE!
Even if the date goes really bad, that’s not a waste of time. Your actually learning something new about yourself – now you’d know what you don’t like in a man/woman. Going on dates is purely for your own research. You don’t have to stay in touch with the ones you don’t like, and keep the others as friends. Along the way, who knows what could happen. Although, for many of you reading this ( you know who you are). I’m not saying to forget him !! :’) Yes I get it you love him – but doesn’t change him from being a complete douche!
(Sad to say I’m actually directing this to more than just the one client!) But that’s the reality of it.
Now this is a really funny one. I’ve come to notice this occurrence on several occasions in the past couple of years.
Sometimes I’ve actually given time frames of relationships and even marriage! The time frames for this certain prediction is almost always spot on (remember I’ll never say always because only God will determine your time).
On one occasion I remember a reading I have to a certain client – Lets call her Mindy*.
She was seeing this absolute douche, I personally started to resent him because of his silly behaviour towards Mindy. Being so self centred it didn’t seem as though he cared about how things would effect her and didn’t really try to make an effort – Ikkkkhhhh (Moroccan moment) yes, I can tell you I did not like him and Mindy laughed every time shed see my frustration would come out for this man boy.
However, funny enough I kept seeing within 1 year on April there was going to be a marriage! Shed laugh and be like “Maryam, come on REALLY!” 😂😂 Was crazy because I saw a child shortly after that…
But funny enough the following year on April – yes, she got married. Now, where I’m getting at with this story is she didn’t marry Mr. ultimate douche … She ended marrying won’t call him Prince Charming because he’s useless when it comes to being absolutely romantic but we’ll call him Mr. Happy and yes they share a very BEAUTIFUL angelic daughter together of whom I’m God mother to. The story of the little angel will be told another time!
Getting back to where I was… So all in all okay predict you and a certain someone will be together but actually anything could happen. This is where I come to you with free will vs destiny
It was destined for Mindy to get married around that time – But her free will chose with whom.
Your Local Friendly Psychic
Maryam – 7th generation Clairvoyant Psychic specialising in cartomancy and tarot readings.
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